Thursday, September 29, 2011

Four Years But Whose Counting?

September 27th came and went with little fanfare and nary a thought.  It wasn't even on my radar  until the night before as Trevor and I were driving back from dinner with friends.  I asked Trevor what he thought about this upcoming anniversary.  What came to his mind is how much I have improved over the last few years- that there are so many things that I am able to do for myself now that we didn't even think possible.  Bravo for Trevor's positivity!  I myself felt that slight tinge of mourning I always feel of possibilities lost.  The "what if" portion of my process.  I usually fight this self indulgence, but being the eve of my TM onset anniversary,  I felt certainly justified in this guilty pleasure, and hey, it's less calories than an entire pint of ice cream- which I also felt deserved of.

The amazing thing was that I woke up this September 27th and it didn't cross my mind, not once all day.  I literally forgot all about it until the next day when I realized "hey- that day went by and nothing happened."  I did get one email from a friend on the day after who said she had been thinking about me, but I felt glad that she did not actually contact me the day of.  It just goes to show that life keeps moving forward.

I met a man tonight at yoga class ( yes, my first yoga class in four years!) who commented on my positive attitude of acceptance.  I said that I was accepting of my situation now as I strive to live in the moment, but I will not give up hope for the future and its possibilities of further recovery.

To demonstrate my idea of living in the moment- here is a short photo montage of a recent cycling event I participated in- a truly beautiful day- Cycling Photos

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What a great post! Please resume writing them!!!!

Greeney